When you’re hurting or notice others hurting, reach out
I’ve worked in the Fire Department for almost ten years. Those who work directly in this field know the traumatic events of car crashes, stabbings, gunshot wounds, drug overdoses, and suicides. As first responders, we have to respond to people’s darkest times of need. These individuals rely on us to save the day. This alone can be stressful. Knowing that if we can’t help them, who would?
Working the call
Call after call, death after death, it started to take a toll. I never thought it would affect me, or maybe I was just trying to ignore the pain I felt for others, but it was still there. About eight years into the fire service, I started to feel different. I’m sure the sleep deprivation of being at busy fire stations didn’t help, but I also felt the effects from the calls. I started to get anxious, which led to heart palpitations, which suddenly led to fear. I started to fear for my family and loved ones. I always thought something bad would happen to them when I wasn’t around. The fear and anxiety took over my life, and I wanted out.
Something I once loved as a career turned into something I despised. I blamed myself for wanting to get into this career. Everyone I talked to told me this was the best career in the world, but they never told me the other side of the job. I wondered whether they, too, felt these effects–or was I alone?
But you are not alone
I realized I wasn’t alone. I didn’t quit as a firefighter and got motivated to help my fellow colleagues because I knew so many were and are hurting.
